Day 65 (205): The first day of the rest of my life

Today was a big day for me.  I attended the New Faculty Orientation at my new university.  This was my first official day of my first real job.  A major turning point.  This all just got real.  I am no longer a student, I am a faculty member!

My generally super confident self was horribly nervous to show up in tennis shoes with my ankle brace to my first day.  First impressions are everything, and I didn't know how people were going to react.  At my previous university, it was almost like it was a burden for them that I was going through these surgeries.  They made me feel quite guilty that I had to choose my health over some of my academic pursuits.  Imagine that?!?!?!

How I expected this new university to receive me was completely opposite from my experience today.  That is exactly why you have to drop your expectations.  They welcomed me with warm, open arms, and were sincerely curious and sympathetic of my feet condition.  It became more of a joke that I am an exercise scientist with injured feet than that it will be an inconvenience for people to have to walk slower when walking with me, or that I have to drive and move my car around campus, because I can't just walk across it, or that I need to sit and rest my feet ever so often.  They were all encouraging me to continue in my recovery, so that soon, they will see me at full strength.

They give me a lot of hope.  I feel the most supported I have ever felt in this lonely journey.

My feet were swollen and painful by the time I got home.  This was from sitting in a chair all day.  The worst possible position for my legs is with the 90 degree bend at the knee caused by sitting.  My feet really still need to be elevated, and if they are not elevated, they need to be propped up at waist level for as many hours of the day as possible.  I did pump my feet and flex my quads all day to keep the blood pumping, but gravity is no one's friend.

---------------------
Reflection

I am at peace with my feet at this point.  I think that I have finally pushed past the heartache and am starting to look towards the future again.  When people asked me about my feet today, I was able to talk about them without bringing up all the pain and emotions of how hard I have struggled for the last year and a half of my life.  Before now, it has been painful to talk about my feet and tell my story, and to imagine how limited my future life may be.  In this environment, I know that I will be ok.  I know that someway, somehow, I will get my active lifestyle back.  Ultimately, I know that I made the right choice in choosing this university, and that is really validating.